09-05-2014, 07:08 AM
You just need to learn to be more positive and take things with the right perspective. Not having a job at 18 while going to school isn't an incredibly shameful thing that warrants the degree of self-hatred you seem to be having over that. It happens, it's not a big deal. School is more important than a shitty dead end job.
I was a lot like you at your age. I had impossibly high standards of perfection towards myself and if things didn't go exactly how I envisioned it I put all of the blame onto myself. Not everything is your fault and not everything is in your control. It's okay even if you mess up. Just keep doing what you can to get yourself to where you want to be, it'll happen eventually as long as you keep at it.
I was a lot like you at your age. I had impossibly high standards of perfection towards myself and if things didn't go exactly how I envisioned it I put all of the blame onto myself. Not everything is your fault and not everything is in your control. It's okay even if you mess up. Just keep doing what you can to get yourself to where you want to be, it'll happen eventually as long as you keep at it.