I tried to give him another chance when we found each other on FB, and then he just continued acting like that. His cousin added me on FB as well, and even he was concerned about the guy, because apparently he acts like that irl, so it wasn't just an internet act.
(09-05-2014, 06:35 PM)crazysam23 Wrote: [ -> ] (09-05-2014, 05:41 PM)fantanoice Wrote: [ -> ]Eh, they've been alright, I've had a few fails though and that's got me a bit worried.
I completely bombed my first try at university. lol
I went to work for a year, after that debacle. (Engineering school wasn't for me, man. Not at all...) Then, I got an Associate's Degree (a 2 year degree) in General Studies. Finally, I went to a state university and got my degree in Computer Science. (Most of the credits from my 2 year transferred over.) Point is, as long as you can prove you've learned from your mistakes and emphasize your strengths, most companies don't care about a few bad apples.
Quote:Worst part is that up to this year my University were using a screwed-up marking system that wasn't aligned with the rest of the state. They fixed it this year, but as a result of that, all my marks excluding the ones from this year don't get counted in my GPA. So dog. >.<'
Damn, that sucks. I assume your degree audit report (or whatever they call it in Aussie Land) shows all the grade letters or percentages, despite your GPA being fucked?
My academic transcript? Yeah, that shows everything.
So me and the other staff decided to finally get proactive with my favorite 30 year old. After me and Okuu (the other mod) had a word with the admin, we first decided to just issue him warnings, and he just kept ignoring them, so we decided to ban him for a week. So far if he comes back and still decides to act like a dick, then he's gonna be perma'd.
After dealing with some complaints, we decided to bring it up with the admin, and even he had a feeling nobody really liked the guy. Also I mentioned that a couple of users said they left because of him, and prior to that, he said there's a good chance he'll scare off new users with how he acts.
Also he recently joined on of the affiliated websites, and it looks like he's gonna end up being banned on that site as well for starting shit.
I did not mean to ignore this thread/respond so late.
I am now out of the extremely pissed off mood I was in for a long time.
(09-05-2014, 06:57 AM)Danjo Wrote: [ -> ]No, its cool for you to have high standards, I guess I just don't want you to exasperate yourself. If you keep going and you aren't getting super discouraged I guess you're doing alright. I just try to let things come as they will these days. (Although sometimes I could definitely use more of your hard-working attitude.)
At least you're going to college though, I feel like its just worse if you aren't.
I will accept this.
However I don't think going to college really says anything about me. If I didn't have a safety net (i.e. parents with money) I would not be able to afford it.
I know this isn't your point but a lot of people have this mindset that: 18 year old who is bad at getting a job and parents can't afford college= lazy kid, but 18 year old who is bad at getting a job and parents can afford college= well it's okay because he's going to college. This says nothing about my own work ethic, which is why I have difficulty accepting it.
(09-05-2014, 07:08 AM)peternorthstars Wrote: [ -> ]You just need to learn to be more positive and take things with the right perspective. Not having a job at 18 while going to school isn't an incredibly shameful thing that warrants the degree of self-hatred you seem to be having over that. It happens, it's not a big deal. School is more important than a shitty dead end job.
I was a lot like you at your age. I had impossibly high standards of perfection towards myself and if things didn't go exactly how I envisioned it I put all of the blame onto myself. Not everything is your fault and not everything is in your control. It's okay even if you mess up. Just keep doing what you can to get yourself to where you want to be, it'll happen eventually as long as you keep at it.
This is the mindset that I have at the moment.
I am for sure going to keep at it.
I didn't mean to respond so late to this either.
(08-31-2014, 07:34 PM)JoelCarli Wrote: [ -> ]In a way, it's cool of you wanting to be a martyr for the sake of other people (not that I want you to suffer either). However, I'm a firm believer that sometimes, it's absolutely essential to suffer for certain things. You don't have to make money off of what you love, and you said it yourself, John doesn't care either if he winds up on the streets in order to do what he loves. Jaco Pastorius is one of the most famous jazz bassists that ever lived, and he went through drug abuse, slept in parks because he was coked up and had no money to pay for rent and was killed after initiating a bar room brawl with a bouncer. But, in return, he did what he loved and earned a legacy for it. He could have chosen anything else -- that's to his discretion.
You said John inspires you. Follow his philosophy of doing what you love, not something that necessarily gives you money (unless you rationalize that in the long run, it's probably better for you -- it could be that having a lot of money will allow you to have a basement studio, making it easier for you to produce music. This is where caution is probably more important).
Do I sometimes wish we could all just be happy and not suffer? Dang right, I do, but that's just not the world we live in. We do get a good tradeoff, however. Many shit tunnels lead to El Dorado. Not many people realize this, myself included to a certain extent, but I've rationalized it enough to assume it as absolutely plausible and probable.
You should also begin with baby steps. Instead of saying "I want to make music for a living" (or whatever) start with something minor -- even if it's not exactly what you want or if it's something you're not really interested in. Make a strategic move rather than a convenient one. Speaking about producing music, maybe you can learn about studio production (which actually can make you quite some money professionally) and produce the debut album of one of your friend's bands or something (if not, put an ad in the paper). It'll give you credit and as a result, royalties. That's what I'm doing in my part time; I'm producing an acoustic comedy duo my friends are in, which means I'll be getting a portion of their cash if ever they make it big (which is likely considering how many people call them for gigs). Yet, I care mostly about the credit and the contact I have with them. These are already incredibly helpful to an aspiring professional musician because it puts said musician into the industry in some way or another. You already have a foot in the doorway, is what I'm saying.
Just giving out ideas. If you weren't referring to making music as being your passion, then this advice can be extrapolated to whatever you are interested in.
I'm glad you're at least getting something done for the sake of your career.
But I'm just not sure what I want to do as a career. I'm not sure if I would be interested enough in music to make a career out of it. Therapy is a cool thing to me though. But again, I don't know if I'll just get bored, or get myself into studying psychology and realize that it isn't for me, by which point it's too late to back out.
I'm jealous because John has found something he seems truly passionate for, and at such a young age. One were he has enough time to really invest in it. I just wish so badly that I could find something that would give me an epiphany, and it just hasn't happened. I'm scared that it never will.
Who knows what could happen. You don't need to rush these things. Epiphanies come without warning.
Have you considered seeing a guidance counselor?
I wouldn't wait on an epiphany, thats not really how life works. I'm pretty sure most people choose their careers like "Well this job doesn't seem to totally suck, so I guess I'll do it for the rest of my life."
(09-08-2014, 01:16 AM)JoelCarli Wrote: [ -> ]Who knows what could happen. You don't need to rush these things. Epiphanies come without warning.
Have you considered seeing a guidance counselor?
I've seen many counselors. They were counselors that were trained in CBT among many other kinds of treatment, and such people are often skilled in career advice because many people's traumas stem from their lifestyle. Their lifestyle being their career. I haven't talked in depth to anyone about my choice of career because honestly I had too many other things to talk about as well. I did try and get in contact with a counselor via the NHS last week, but it's completely chockablock with people and so there are no appointments available for a few weeks.
I do feel as though I need to rush these things because recently I've had to make some very big decisions about what my career will be when I haven't had the time or the life experience to know what I want. If I'm going to have an epiphany, now would be a pretty swell old time.
(09-08-2014, 02:45 AM)Danjo Wrote: [ -> ]I wouldn't wait on an epiphany, thats not really how life works. I'm pretty sure most people choose their careers like "Well this job doesn't seem to totally suck, so I guess I'll do it for the rest of my life."
What constitutes 'doesn't suck' is pretty darn subjective though. 'Doesn't suck' could be seen as an utterly monotonous grind that at least puts food on the table to one person. While 'doesn't suck' could be seen as being a dream job to another. I only have one life, I want to spend it doing something fulfilling. I'm sure you can understand that.
You might have to wait those couple of weeks if you want guidance regarding your career then. It may be well worth it. In the meantime, you could do some extensive research when you have the time. I know there are tests on the web designed by schools where you fill in a questionnaire and you are given a list of possible careers you would probably be interested in and good at (I've had to do this kind of test a couple times during elementary and middle school).
Seriously, forget the whole epiphany thing. Its just gonna stress you out. You can never be completely sure that any decision you're going to make is going to be the right one. Even in retrospect you won't be able to tell. Thats life. If theres something you think you want to do, figure out how to do it. If you have no idea what you want to do, pick something and stick with it until you either decided its what you want to do, or you can come up with a bunch of specific reasons why its not what you want to do at all. If you have no personal preference in life choices always try to pick the option that will open up the most opportunities for you. For instance, if you don't know if you want to research Astrophysics or open up a bowling alley, get your Ph.D. in astrophysics. You can always go back and open a bowling alley after you get your degree, but you can't start doing astrophysics research after you've been running a bowling alley.